Looking at the picture above one would wonder why is the man in a black t-shirt holding the hand of the lady being embraced by the guy in a shirt. In a married couple this is what we refer to as adultery. Intimacy between a married individual and someone else who is not his or her marriage partner is what we call adultery, the other one who is in an intimate relationship with the married individual can either be married or not. What Jim does in "The Have and the Have Nots" by Tyler Perry. One thing that one would wonder about is who is really to blame for the situation in the picture? The guy in black or the lady?
In most societies, especially in the past, women would suffer the most if they are found guilty of the crime of adultery. In Jewish society, until Jesus stopped it, a woman found guilty of adultery was stoned to death. Jesus Christ Himself proved adultery to be the highest crime, He called it as a crime which is enough to compromise the law of death doing a married couple apart and allowed one to divorce their wives if found guilty of adultery. Even in many African cultures, the wife is sent off her marital home if found guilty of adultery. One thought that has pushed me to pen this partucular piece is the 'unfair' nature of the punishment of adultery. Why do women suffer more than men in cases of those found guilty of adultery?
Can Themba authored "The Suit" and showed us clearly the situation whereby a man guilty of adultery walks free. In that story, Matilda, Philemon's wife is caught red handed by her husband, she is caught in the act of adultery. What Philemon does is allow the man to go free and then punish his wife in a more psychological than physical manner.Philemon orders his wife, Matilda to take care of a coat the adulterous partner left in their house as a visitor. He orders Matilda to dish the coat, take the coat for a walk among other things. Only Matilda suffers here, not the man who was caught in the act with her. At the end of it Matilda takes her own life. Most things are inherently done in societies, just like the punishment of one culprit in adultery, that is to say are done without any explanation. So, one who gives him/herself time to think and have an internal deliberation of the issues may come up with a notion of why somethings are done in a particular fashion. On the issue at hand, I have deliberated in the issue with myself and with my friends, the conclusion was that society knows in a way that women have the power to clear themselves from any form of adulterous acts. It is the Lady who has to agree for an adultery to take place. If they can set their foot or maybe both feet down and say "No! I'm married" or "No! You are married" adultery can die a natural death.
That being said, let me try to paint to you a picture of men when it comes to their sexual appetite. There is one friend of mine whom I always label as 'pevert', whenever I say that he's always like "man, Im straight". By straight in this situatiin he means ' not gay',thus arguing that having feelings towards women is expected from him, appreciating their assets is expected of him. Every straight man is expected to be touched when a well asseted lady is at his view. This puts men at a position wherby they say "I love you" to a lot if women, or they just try to spark conversations with a lot of women. Most men, straight men, enjoy talking to a sweet lady, not neccessarily to beg for love, but just the chat. As a result of that men need a lot of courage to win against a lady who is availing herself to them. As well as they need a lot of courage to stay away from telling nice words to ladies, men enjoy making any women smile, whether they know the lady or not. Lately my friends, and maybe me, that is if my gurlfriend won't see this post; we complain that we no more enjoy the privilledge of testing our charming abilities. We lost this privilledge because once you say to a lady "how are you, is that a smile or you are just beautiful?", that lady is already in the list of your girlfriends. That's bad, please ladies, give us the chance to prove whether we are serious or not.
Not in an intention to support gender based injustices, I am one person who has respect for women, one reason for my respect is the fact that I was raised by a women alone . I am one soul who prefers "gender harmony", I'm fully behind the equal chances regardless of gender. Back to tbe adultery issue, I believe the powerful creatures, women, have the power to ensure that adultery comes to and end. They have the power to say "No", even much better now that patriachy is long dead. Women have the power not to engage in any intimate relationship with a married man, also to be clean of any intimate relationship besides their husbands. It is women who say "Yes" to a married man, as well as it is they who say "Yes" to another man while they are married. They hold the keys, they are the drivers if the ship, they choose who to allow in or not. Men are always willing to sneak around scooping sugar from any open bowl.
Please, get me right here. I am not trying to encourage promiscuity in men, and I am not trying to justufy their horny rabbit habits. Instead, I am imploring my fellow sisters to take it to their hands and ensure that no other women cries the pillow wet no more, ensure that all women are given the deserved quality time by their spouses. Women, you have the power to stop the cry, stop the single parenting by women, stop the bitterness in other women's lives. Say "NO" to a married man and say "NO" to a man who wants to ruin your marriage.